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Jack Handey thinks dinosaurs are overrated.

"Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay"

Seated on a stool, Angela Lansbury addresses the camera as a pistol goes off.

The Skating Club of Southern New England will present its 23rd annual ice show, "Won Hit Wonders," this weekend at the Alexio Ice Arena in Taunton.

ABC News' Bob Woodruff will anchor a weekly environment-oriented series for Planet Green, a network being launched by Discovery Communications.

Three years after tying the knot in a spectacular, over-the-top affair that caused some backlash, Star Jones has decided to end her marriage to banker Al Reynolds.

Where to go and what to do in SouthCoast this week

My wife Allison and I have been driving past Milano Restaurant on Route 44 in Rehoboth ever since we met back in 2006.

On Friday, in celebration of the Zeiterion's presentation of Orson Welles's "Moby Dick Rehearsed" by the acclaimed Acting Company, the Zeiterion, the New Bedford Whaling National Whaling Historical Park and the New Bedford Whaling Museum have come...

"Deception"

The Sippican Choral Society will present its annual Spring Concert at 8 p.m. Friday and Saturday evenings at St. Gabriel's Church in Marion.

'Baby Mama'

Calling all islanders, parrotheads and beach bums! Get yourself and your friends down to the Zeiterion, because Island Night is back!

ABC returns with original episodes of its potentially formidable Thursday-night line-up.

In the closing moments of the last new "Lost" episode that aired in March, it appeared that the Frenchwoman, Rousseau (Mira Furlan), was cut down by an unseen enemy along with her daughter's boyfriend.

I must confess that I only started attending wine tastings seriously since I began writing this column about a year ago.

Picture this: an intricate tapestry of woven rope, earth and glass. Or this: shimmering, towering walls of iron, jutting upwards to pierce the sky.

Something good is happening in the north end of the Wailing City. Every Friday night the pool hall Accu-Billiards is hosting a mini arts festival, featuring music, film, and art in its back room.

UMass introduces Derek Kellogg as their new men's basketball coach. (4/23/08)

Mieke and Liz tell you what's happening this weekend

Photo by Mieke Zuiderweg/The Republican

Download each segment as an mp3 file [Right Click > Save As] or listen with the audio players.

• Introduction by UMass Athletic Director John McCutcheon and full statement by new men's basketball coach Derek Kellogg.

• Derek Kellogg fields question from members of the press and the Maroon Platoon.

• Extended question and answer session with Derek Kellogg.

• Chris Lowe talks about his expectations for next season.

• Ricky Harris describes the team's first meeting with Derek Kellogg.

It's a good question: What will be Derek Kellogg's coaching style as head coach at UMass?

I think many people's suspicions have been confirmed with Kellogg's hiring of strategy guru Vance Walberg as an assistant coach, as reported by Matt Vautour in the Gazette.

Walberg has risen to prominence as the inventor of the so-called Dribble Drive Motion offense, which has been adopted in various forms by a slew of teams at all levels of play in recent years, most notably in college basketball by, you guessed it, John Calipari at Memphis.

With this hire, it's pretty safe to say what the UMass offense is going to look like moving forward.

Here is a diagrammed example of a standard Dribble Drive Motion play:

Imagine that slashing/rotating movement repeated, again and again, with players reacting differently to the positioning of defenders, and you see why Walberg initially dubbed this style of play "Attack, Attack, Skip Pass, Attack, Attack."

I'm hardly an expert on these matters, but to my eyes this system uses many of the same concepts the Minutemen employed under Travis Ford last season. It seems to me that Ford incorporated enough elements of Pitinoball -- the heavy reliance on the three-point shot, the trapping, the running and gunning -- to place his system outside of what I understand the Dribble Drive Motion system to be. Maybe I'm wrong about that, or maybe it's debatable. At any rate, we definitely saw a similar approach to spacing, positioning around the perimeter, and dribble penetration last season. That Kellogg appears to be bringing in a system that maintains those principles can only ease the transition for the players.

Here is a look inside a Memphis practice, with Calipari describing the system in his inimitable way:

And finally here is a compilation video of Memphis running the Dribble Drive Motion offense, with footage from prior to the '07-'08 season.

Four years ago at Boston College, Joe Madaus, my brother and four other guys shared a suite so grimy, a girl could get pregnant there while fully clothed. But as the host of No Filter Coffee Break on Boston.tv, the 25 year-old has cleaned up his act and put on a tie to interview Boston's rising comedy talent in two-minute segments that include comedy skits which Madaus writes and produces with input from the comedians.

"No Filter Coffee Break is like two-minute dating for comedians," says Rick Jenkins, owner of The Comedy Studio. "We have to do our own PR. That's why having Joe put together something so professional is a real help. It's become a badge of honor to be included in his little films." There isn't much Madaus would say 'no' to for Boston comedy. In one episode, Madaus interviews Micah Sherman while Sherman's frank and beans dangle in the soft breeze. In another, Madaus gets bent over the hood of a car for a full cavity search.

Comic Myq Kaplan calls Madaus "Boston Comedy's Best Friend," but you might also recognize Madaus in such archetypes as: Irish Underdog; Self-Deprecating Jester; and Young Man Trying to Make a Name for Himself. I think there's tarot card with his face on it. Madaus is originally from Boylston, "just outside the fifth-greatest city in Massachusetts, Worcester," he explains. "Actually Worcester just built the new Hanover Theater, so it's now the third greatest city, after Framingham." Madaus decided on the term "no filter" because people used to tell his parents he had no filter on his mouth. "And 'Coffee Break' because the segments are usually short and bitter, like Peter Dinklage," he adds.

While googling Peter Dinklage, we ask Madaus what we could do to make this story funny. "Just tell readers to make fart noises while they read," he suggests. But we inform him—oh, right, the midget guy!—that we and our readers already make fart noises.

According to Madaus, the Boston comedy scene has grown a little more even-keeled since its salty days of vehement anti-New York sentiment. "The anti-New York thing was then, not too much now," he says. "People look at Boston as an excellent place to develop a voice. You have the opportunity to mess up and get better. No one really pulls anyone down. Comedians here are generally smart, supportive and critically constructive."

"Joe Madaus' No Filter Coffee Break is the perfect way to perk up the funny bone," says comedian Shane Mauss. "My funny bone happens to be in my pants."

"The No Filter Coffee Break has put the Boston comedy scene right where it belongs," says Comedian Dan Boulger adds, "one notch below porn and one notch above spam."

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I'm always a little surprised when cable networks go outside of their comfort zone. But just what is E! thinking with the two-hour special "Going Postal: 15 Shocking Acts of Violence" (8 p.m., E!)?

The ninth annual Miss Massachusetts Outstanding Teen Pageant will be held at 4 p.m. Sunday at Bristol Community College Arts Center in Fall River.

The Dixie Diehards, the Bay State's newest Dixieland and classic jazz band, will be cooking up a smorgasbord of hot jazz, blues and gospel music at ­­­­­­­7:30 p.m. Saturday at the Marion Art Center.

Carly Smithson lost another chance to be a superstar.

The 70th anniversary of the reservoir

Students learn how to cook